Hey y’all ❤️

Either the weeks are getting longer or I just really had a long week. It doesn’t feel like I just talked to y’all last week 🙃😕. How y’all been? I call myself started a new eating trend last week….lol we can talk about it next week 😂😂🤦🏾‍♀️

Also- I’ve ehh…well… I’ve been battling depression. That’s what sparked the eating change and gym regimen reboot bc there is no way I can go back to that place. Life has really been hitting lately honey…. yea I needed the extra discipline. Mistakenly, I took the weekend off for gym and diet andddddd yea that was a mistake because with that lack of discipline, my emotions have been just a tad more persuasive. Case and point- I’ve yet to leave my bed for today. I’ve been in and out of sleep, no appetite, no desire for conversation, not even in the place to want to pray…. How could I let myself fall this deep today? I failed to adequately check in. As figured out as I thought I had it- worship/pray, gym, class, work, meetings or whatever other obligation I have after work- I did not take the time to check Jada. My depression can be functional for weeks without me noticing it, which is why I set up various outlets- whether it be accountability, this blog, treating myself to something….. I have things in place to keep me on the right track and avoid days like today.

**wipes tears

But today isn’t over. I still have time to go for a walk, go get something to eat, or to just treat myself. You have to have enough grace to pull yourself up. It doesn’t matter how anyone else shows you grace if you then turn around condemn yourself with no mercy. There’s no growth in that. And I can’t go back to place anymore; and because for whatever reason you’ve stuck with me through these blogs, neither can you. Your place may not be mine, but that place that puts you back into your box, back into your hole, pushes hope out of your beliefs for yourself…. it’s Monday, you have things to do to set you up for the week. We don’t have time for that place anymore.

You have to give yourself the same grace Jesus showed Peter out on the water. Yes he fell and lost faith for a moment, BUT with Jesus hand in hand, he got back up to walk again. It sucks falling- especially when you didn’t see it coming but don’t let the surprise of the fall keep you down. Muster up the faith within yourself to believe this isn’t the end for you; Your father has everything under control and baby the fight is fixed. The fight is fixed!!!!! Everything daring to exalt itself against the God in you is already cast down, despite how it feels- screw how it feels- it’s under your feet.

Get up girl, and walk again.

Love you bunches ❤️

-Jada B.